5

Both the simple and the continuous are out there, but if you had to pick one:

I miss you.

I am missing you.

...

She misses her family.

She is missing her family.

I want to say that the *stative form of this verb in the simple tense is INHERENTLY CONTINUOUS and that the continuous tense can be done without. (Should be done without for a cleaner language usage?)

Edit #2 (I meant to say stative every time I wrote *intransitive)

and I found this:

http://is.muni.cz/th/178421/ff_m_b1/Stative_verbs_with_the_progressive.txt

http://www.perfect-english-grammar.com/support-files/stative-verbs-list.pdf

I thank you for the debate.

SurvMach
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  • I'm not sure I understand your edit. Both usages are acceptable in English. You cannot just do away with one. But, you can feel free to use them fairly interchangeably. – David M Feb 20 '14 at 15:41
  • @DavidM Thank you for your comment. Would you give me one instance where I could not get away with the simple present alone. – SurvMach Feb 20 '14 at 15:50
  • I believe I understand your question now. And I've answered below. In short, feel free to never use the continuous again. But, it does set a tone better in some cases as I've shown below. But, both modalities would be 100% appropriate with minimal sacrifice of meaning. – David M Feb 20 '14 at 15:57
  • possible duplicate of How do the tenses in English correspond temporally to one another? – FumbleFingers Feb 20 '14 at 17:46
  • @FumbleFingers Oh no you don't! This guy doesn't want to know what they mean. He wants the gerund usage stricken from the language!!!!!! – David M Feb 20 '14 at 19:22
  • @David: He's welcome to strike it from his own (personal) language - but hands off mine and yours! It's a "loaded" example though, since you'd rarely tell someone "I'm missing you". On the other hand, you'd virtually never say to someone "I watch you" - it's invariably "I'm watching you" (which btw isn't a "gerund usage". That's "Does my watching while you're undressing bother you?" - used as a noun). – FumbleFingers Feb 20 '14 at 22:26
  • @FumbleFingers It wasn't my intention to annoy you. It's just that I noticed a pattern where stative verbs don't need the continuous at all when in the present. I am not referring to all gerunds, as a matter of a fact I find gerund verbals some of the most interesting parts of speech. (in "I am watching you" to watch is a dynamic verb) – – SurvMach Feb 21 '14 at 01:06
  • @SurvMach Whether you choose to accept it or, the continuous tense is a perfectly acceptable usage here in a few usages. I grant you that it is not the most common usage, but in the situations I've outlined below it is correct. Wastefulness in language is not a consideration for correctness. Sorry. – David M Feb 21 '14 at 04:33
  • Also, what @FumbleFingers means by a peeve is that you are expressing your dislike for a usage, not asking about the validity of that usage. Peeves are generally considered off-topic here. – David M Feb 21 '14 at 04:34
  • @FumbleFingers Yeah, you're correct. That was not the gerund. I admittedly get confused on some of the proper names for grammatical devices despite my ability to use them correctly. – David M Feb 21 '14 at 04:35
  • @FumbleFingers Feel free to delete it. As I stated in my answer, this particular case seems to be evolving into both usages being completely accepted. Won't see me using the continuous in this case though. – SurvMach Feb 22 '14 at 02:38
  • @SurvMach: I may have higher rep than you, but I'm just a user, not a mod. So in this case, you've got more "super-powers" than me - you can delete your own question, but I can't delete it. If enough people downvote the question, I may be allowed to *vote* to delete it, but that still wouldn't happen unless several others voted to delete as well. – FumbleFingers Feb 22 '14 at 12:43
  • @FumbleFingers It's all good man. I tried to delete it but it has already been answered and I can't. Please look at my answer though, my opinion is that in this particular case the language is evolving in the wrong direction. Do you consider wastefulness to be right or wrong? – SurvMach Feb 22 '14 at 13:06
  • @@SurvMach: I think you get better answers for stuff like this on English Language Learners - see, for example, Is the word "think" stative or dynamic? – FumbleFingers Feb 22 '14 at 13:40
  • @FumbleFingers friend, note that I am not questioning which verbs are stative and which are dynamic but instead the redundancy of the stative verb used in the continuous form and its implications on the sharpness of a language. #wastefulness – SurvMach Feb 22 '14 at 13:56
  • I think you're assuming English would somehow be "improved" if it discarded all constructions that might be considered "wasteful" (i.e. - if the language were "re-specified" to minimise "redundancy"). If you want that kind of thing, go for a computer language like C or Pascal. Verbal languages are more like the genetic code of DNA - what might look like redundancy usually turns out to be a mechanism for incorporating flexibility to meet as-yet-unidentified needs (or past needs which might resurface in another guise later). – FumbleFingers Feb 22 '14 at 14:08
  • @FumbleFingers deep. maybe too deep, but who am I to judge. I am thinking that I am understanding you. – SurvMach Feb 22 '14 at 14:13
  • I think that all native speakers would accept my usage you're assuming above, and that the vast majority would approve it over simple present in that exact context. On the other hand, few if any would accept (let alone approve) either of the present continuous usages in your last sentence above. But per my original closevote, the "invitation to discussion" is Off Topic and POB - and if you're not interested in learning why native use the forms they do, nobody is forcing you to "attend classes" at ELL. – FumbleFingers Feb 22 '14 at 14:20
  • @FumbleFingers try not to think about it every time you say it. And yes, from a forever ESL student. – SurvMach Feb 22 '14 at 14:23
  • One is making the assumption. – SurvMach Feb 22 '14 at 16:42

5 Answers5

3

It depends on whether you want to convey a mental state or an activity.

This kind of question comes up frequently for me. I am a native English speaker, but my wife is from Germany, and I sometimes get questions like this from our German friends. (For those who do not know, German has no present progressive tense, so context and additional language must be used to convey the concept).

I don't know of a hard-and-fast rule, but I have noticed the pattern that in English, verbs denoting mental states or emotion (wants, desires, hopes, wishes...) are more often placed in the simple present, even when one might think a present progressive form would be appropriate e.g., "I love this soup." **

So although the present progressive form is perfectly acceptable, my vote would be for "I miss my family;" the implication that it is current and ongoing is already implicit in the fact that it is a mental state. (Unless of course it were part of sentence such as "I am missing my family - I just can't get a clear shot from this window." :)

Questor

** Thus I think the previous McDonalds catch phrase, "I'm loving it," is actually quite brilliant, as it turns the simple mental ascent of good taste into an enjoyable activity by the sheer act of bucking the convention.

Questor
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1

I think this boils down to personal preference (and possibly regional dialect).

I would typically say:

I miss you.

She misses her family.

But, the others are 100% acceptable.

Of note, there is a sense of immediacy from using the gerund form. It makes it sound as if it's having an acute effect right now.

So, saying:

I am missing my family; that's why I'm crying.

Versus:

I miss my family. Say, have you got any more of that delicious jam?

Edit: Per your request in comments. There really is not a reason you could not go the remainder of your life without using the continuous form. As I've stated, it's largely a matter of style and intent. I would point to the examples above as a usage where the continuous is more convenient, but not critical.

David M
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  • the question has been edited – SurvMach Feb 20 '14 at 15:37
  • @SurvMach See my comment above. The edit doesn't significantly change my answer. – David M Feb 20 '14 at 15:42
  • What do you think of this analogy? If the English language were Python code the continuous would be wasteful code. This is how I see it and that's why I dislike the usage of the continuous. I wonder if you would empathize with my perspective. – SurvMach Feb 20 '14 at 15:59
  • Ahhhhhh. As the child of a computer programmer, I sympathize with you. But, dislike it or not, language is something that happens around us as well as something that we make happen for our own. Your personal preference can ONLY dictate the way that you speak and write. The works of others are, unfortunately, beyond your control. So, nod and move on. Choose the usage you prefer when you speak and live and let live. – David M Feb 20 '14 at 16:01
  • .............;) – SurvMach Feb 20 '14 at 16:04
  • Also, I'll add that language is far more nuanced than computer code. It has evolved over eons to allow the description of feelings, moods, situations, eventualities, etc. And, it often must do many at the same time. Hence the often (seemingly) redundant use cases. They often convey subtleties that computer code wouldn't need to address. – David M Feb 20 '14 at 16:05
  • There is a great expression used by Kurt Vomnegut to describe futile efforts (in this case writing an anti-war book -- Slaughterhouse 5). It paraphrases to: Why don't you go write a book protesting trees? – David M Feb 20 '14 at 16:08
  • Please imagine yourself on the phone with a special one... "I miss you" "I am missing you"... I can't see it, and believe me I am all for nuance. – SurvMach Feb 20 '14 at 16:09
  • I miss you on occasion, mostly when using the toilet for extended periods and my my mind wanders. I am missing you as we speak! How's that for nuance? – David M Feb 20 '14 at 16:24
  • let us continue this discussion in chat – David M Feb 20 '14 at 16:26
0

Removing the 'sticky' 2 letter words makes a sentence more powerful and writing more persuasive/engaging. Unless you are emphasizing that her missing you is something which is occurring unexpectedly (e.g "I thought she wouldn't miss you but she is missing you a lot."), I'd encourage parsimony.

pavja2
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0

While it's true that "I miss you" is just fine, saying "I'm missing you" communicates an extra detail: that it's a temporary state--NOW--that's bound to change. So we generally say "We're missing you" when we feel really down and homesick, and we're thinking about that special person who isn't with us. So I'd say, "I'm missing you" is a touch more emphatic than "I miss you".

Louel
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0

please paste

thegrammarexchange.infopop.cc/eve/forums/a/tpc/f/340600179/m/6306002132?r=6306002132

http://www.perfect-english-grammar.com/support-files/stative-verbs-list.pdf

SurvMach
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