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I can see the difference between "this" / "that" in most common contexts. There are a couple of unusual ones, though, that are still pretty unclear to me.

Here are some of them:

1.A friend of mine is talking about some weird, violent events from his recent past. After he finishes talking, do I say:
"Wow, that's crazy"
or
"wow, this is crazy"?

2.I am looking at a fight scene happening in front of me. Two guys are kicking, punching each other. Do I say to my friend:
"Jeez, that's madness"
or
"Jeez, this is madness"?

3.Someone on TV is giving an opinion that I totally agree with. Do I say:
"Yeah! That's exactly what I mean/I think"
or
"Yeah! This is exactly what I mean/I think"

I guess what I`m trying to figure out is when to use "that" and "this", when either:
1.) referring to something that is happening or has happened, or
2.) referring to what somebody has said

Hellion
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Igo
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    [1/2] I can't answer this from a strict grammatical perspective; if that's what you're seeking, you might have better luck over on our sister site, [ELL.se]. But as a native speaker, I can offer some guidance and a couple of rules of thumb: proximity and possession. Proximity is easy: if it's here, use this; if it's there, use that. – Dan Bron Apr 10 '15 at 09:49
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    [2/2] Possession is definitely fuzzier for those who haven't grown up with it and developed an intuitive grasp, but: in (1) Your friend had the experience of the violent events; you did not. You don't possess the experience and the events aren't occurring here. So use that. By contrast, in (2), the fight is here and both you and your friend are experiencing it (you both possess the experience): use this. In (3), the newscaster is expressing an opinion: his opinion. The opinion is his, he possesses it. You agree with that opinion (the one over there, that he has). – Dan Bron Apr 10 '15 at 09:54

1 Answers1

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This is a tough issue.

You may consider the advice in this reference:

Accessing Noun-Phrase Antecedents (RLE Linguistics B: Grammar) By Mira Ariel

Note that in English, for example, that requires identifiability by both speaker and addressee, whereas this sometimes refers to objects only accessible to the speaker. [see the rest of the section]

Marius Hancu
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