3

My cousin's child would be my first cousin once removed, and I would be the same to them, but according to the same link:

The appropriate name for addressing your cousin’s child is niece or nephew, even though they are actually first cousins once removed.

If that's the case, is it also common practice for them to call me aunt/uncle even though it's not technically correct?

tchrist
  • 134,759
  • What do you mean “not technically correct”? Vocative kinship titles are honorifics; they are signs of respect. In cultures where a child does not directly address an elder by that elder’s first name, it is perfectly correct to prefix that name with an honorific like aunt or uncle as a form a respect. – tchrist May 22 '17 at 13:37
  • Your first cousin's child is your second cousin. There is no title. The person who wrote this: "The appropriate name for addressing your cousin’s child is niece or nephew, even though they are actually first cousins once removed." is highly misinformed and does not understand family relations, lineage, and I would not have them do a family tree or any ancestry research until they understand this. The ONLY way to have a niece or nephew is when your own sibling (your brother or sister) has a child. Your cousin's children are not your nieces and nephews, they are your 2nd cousins. You can only be – Lavender Lady Jun 12 '22 at 18:27
  • @LavenderLady I'm afraid you're embarrassingly mistaken in this, and the person you're so stridently calling wrong is 100% correct. We even have a question about it. Please look this up. Here's a handy graphic that shows who's who. See? It's really not hard. Furthermore, this is a comment not an answer, so thither it shall go. Please use the answer box only for answers, not for comments. – tchrist Jun 12 '22 at 21:24

1 Answers1

6

Yes, in General American English, the descriptive label for the grandchildren of your great-grandparent that are not your parents or aunts/uncles (or children of one's cousin) is 'first cousin once removed'.

But how you address them is really not settled or commonly agreed upon in the US. It all depends on your family's patterns, how close you all are, etc.

Using 'uncle so-and-so' or 'aunt so-and-so' for such a person would be similar to calling any friend or person in one's parent's generation the same, that is, some people do it, some don't. Also, this kind of calling is probably only for children – as they get older, they'll probably call them by their first name. (Of course, the older generation will probably only use the younger person's first name in any case.)

So feel free to use it if all parties are comfortable with it, but I would say it is not terribly common but that could be because the incidence of knowing well one's first cousin once removed isn't that common.

1006a
  • 22,820
Mitch
  • 71,423
  • 1
    For the record, both your parent’s first cousin and your first cousin’s child are equally considered your first cousin once removed. Also, you ahve some tyops you mihgt want to fxi. – tchrist May 22 '17 at 13:34
  • This matches my experience in the UK too. – AndyT May 22 '17 at 13:49
  • @tchrist re your first comment, the OP made that clear in the first line. – Mitch May 22 '17 at 13:54
  • My own personal experience in this matter is that a couple of my dad's friends I was led to call 'Uncle so-and-so' when I was about 5, but by the time I was in my id teens I called then just So-and-so (when other adults of the same age would be called 'Mr. Last-name'. Also, my great-uncle I called 'Uncle So-and-so' (because that's what my parents called him, and my great-great-aunt 'Aunt X' similarly, but I don't think I knew any first cousins once removed in older generations. So 'Uncle/Aunt X' is good for anybody in an older generation as long as you're 'close' (no hard and fast rules) – Mitch May 22 '17 at 14:00
  • 1
    This seems about right. I do spend time with a lot of my 1st-once-removed cousins, in both directions; in my family, we don't use honorifics for this relationship, just first names. However, it wouldn't surprise me if other families did it differently, especially if there was a clear generational demarcation (in my family, some once-removed cousins are much closer in age than some 1st cousins). – 1006a May 22 '17 at 15:23
  • http://blog.oxforddictionaries.com/2013/08/naming-of-cousins/ – Tom22 May 22 '17 at 17:10
  • re @Tom22 's link, and re Alice in Wonderland - Note that there is a difference between what the name of thing is, what you call it/them, what you call the name, and what it is. oh, also the thing itself. Here we're concerned with what you call the person to their face. Also, see this ELU answer for a bigger diagram – Mitch May 22 '17 at 18:01